::Unexpected::

::CLUES::

For weeks Aidan has been shuffling things around in the downstairs freezer. Elaine drove down from Kingston to celebrate our birthdays--a month early. She came all the way out to pick me up, even though it would have made more sense to meet her at the restaurant. Reservations were early: for 5:30. I was encouraged to dress up. Aidan was overly accommodating when we asked him to get off work early. Aidan hollered, "come back to me by 8:00," from the porch as we drove away. Restaurant banter touched upon babies and showers on more than one occasion. Elaine was very anxious to get the bill. Elaine seemed eager to head home due to "stomach pain."

So many clues.

They are easy to spot, looking back. But none of them helped me at all. I saw the cars spilling out of our driveway, and the balloons strung on the mailbox. And even then, I couldn't guess what the occasion could be. I was utterly baffled.

A baby shower? For me? But why? I'm only supposed to get one!

I guess my friends and family disagreed. My darling sister gathered the troops and filled my house with people I loved, all bearing meals to pack my freezer and clothes to adorn my new little girl. Tiny shoes and frilly bloomers. Handmade crib sheets, blankets and tiny outfits. Pink, pink, PINK! I was so thrilled to get my hands on all the girlie items I refused to indulge in with Caelah.

As is often the case, my heart only became truly touched once the house was empty and quiet once more. I noticed the small touches: the bud vases spread throughout the house filled with flowers in the shades I love most. The candles burning here and there. The food wrapped and waiting in the fridge and freezer. Even a beautiful loaf especially for tomorrow's breakfast. Oh! So much love. So much care and thoughtfulness.

My little sister tired herself out for me. She came and went with loads of supplies: lanterns, pretty napkins, games and prizes, candies and cake. . .

THANKS KATE.

Near-spoiler #1: Aidan had worked hard to keep our freezer somewhat empty these past weeks in order to accommodate the meals Kate had told him would be coming. However, the morning of the shower I happened to head to Costco and came back with a trunk brimming with groceries. Including 11 loaves of bread... Hey, I like to plan ahead! When Aidan opened the trunk and groaned, I assumed it was because he was worried about our budget.

Near-spoiler #2: I was prepared for a girl's night out. I was not at all on track with eating and returning home by 7:30. I tried to drag Elaine all over Chapters after leaving the restaurant. Her "stomach ache" was brought on out of a panicked need to get me home!

Surprises rarely work out, but this party was completely unexpected.
Proof: I wore no makeup!

::Canada Day 2009::

It has been a necessary regression. Three years ago we all went down to the Hill as a family and watched the fireworks up close. Two years ago we left a few kids behind in hopes of managing the oldest few. Last year we parked ourselves blocks away on a bridge to watch. This year we stayed out of the downtown core entirely.

Those of us with young kids decided to try something new. We had a BBQ at Melrose, then walked down to the river. After some deliberation, it was decided that higher is better, so strollers and kids got hauled up the hill. We settled up above my old train bridge and waited in the relative comfort of elbow room and fresh air. No smelly throngs. No elbows in the ribs. No foul language and questionably weedy smells. Just a picnic blanket on a hill, along with a few other families strung out in a loose band across the crest of the hill.


Boom!

::Sugar Maple::

A Holiday-appropriate post:

The City gave us a tree. Yeah, I know the last thing we need is another tree. But this tree has perks. It's a sugar maple. My romanticism projects great things upon this tree: syrup in the spring. Vibrant foliage in the Fall. Branches for climbing. . .

Our lot is packed with oaks that have grown upwards in forest conditions. There are no "tire swing" branches. The nearest branch to the ground is twenty feet up and reaching stiffly up to the sky. This baby tree will be pruned to grow into a full, rounded shape. Maybe ten years down the road it will be strong enough climbing.

As for syrup, I have read that it could take up to 25 years for our little tree to offer up good sap. But we could always give it a try a decade sooner...

And colour-- that is a guarantee. Even this fall, the handful of leaves already grown should offer up more colour than most of our other trees combined.

We've planted out front so it will be the first thing you see when you turn into the driveway. Years from now, in early Autumn, I hope to see a huge splash of orange and red when I take that last turn towards home. Until then, we wait.


Happy Canada Day

:;PLAY::

For Stephanie

::Peas in a Pod::

::Passed through me::

". . . my children [have] passed through me on their way into life."

These are the words of a mother of twelve, marvelling at the honour of being a bearer, no matter how temporary, for her beautiful children. I was struck by the sentiment. It resonates with me. Here I am--a fifth baby in my womb--only 5 weeks left to hold her inside me. I will never hold another baby in me again. I want to grasp this fully now so I can cope with the loss of it later but life is too busy to slowly savour these last days. I feel her move and wiggle and already I find I am looking beyond to her days of independent life--outside. Encompassed by the warmth of family, but on the other side of my skin.

I have heard that this feeling of loss will revisit me when they each leave home. There will be a new sense of parting and mourning as they leave the inside of family life and pass through to a life apart from Aidan and I, and from their siblings. I brace myself against the pain I suspect will be involved in that. Yet that parting can be held off for years. This parting is imminent. Nine months, five times over, is what I have been given. And we have arrived at our last few days.

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven--the Ecclesiastical saying goes. This season is drawing to a close. I will mourn. But not for long.

::Life: un-cut::

{::Wild phlox at Fitzroy this past weekend::}

Caelah just finished up a season of HipHop lessons. We attended her "recital" and were delighted to find she has fantastic rhythm and appears to be a natural. We were not so delighted to witness her struggle through her final dance-- not because she was forgetting her parts or unable to perform the moves--but because she was busy trying to "pick an itch" that happened to be UP HER NOSE!

Elijah, unlike the other kids had been resistant to praying out loud. He will repeat what we pray, but hasn't wanted to pray with his own words. Yet, the other night, after a very hard day, he was ready; "I'm sorry I was bad, Jesus. Please give me another chance."

Gabriel has come a long way with his speech. In fact he very rarely stops talking. But we have discovered that he has odd gaps in his abilities. He can say "because" or "bigger" or "brother," but for some reason he can NOT say "back up." Instead he puts an "f" where the"b" belongs. Take a moment to say that out loud a few times. See the problem? Aidan and I were driving down the road when Gabriel erupted; "@#!* up! @#!* up! Did you see that, daddy? Why aren't you @#!*ing up?!"

Isaiah has a love/hate relationship with my parent's cat. He will give a blood-curdling scream if the thing so much as looks at him. Yet, just this weekend he strung his first two words together to say; "Hi kitty!"

I have been badly chastened. Upon muttering a very ungracious opinion to myself--(or so I thought)-- the other day, one of children proceeded to share it with the person whose item of clothing was the object of my comment; "My mommy says that your dress is just awful." Ugh.

Coach Aidan has been doing a fantastic job on the t-ball field these past few months. This is what coaching t-ball sounds like;

"Good hit! Ok, run. No--not that way--the other way. Touch the base. No--stop running! Come back! You need to stay there! Hannah, there's the ball! See it? It's right there. Ok, get it. Throw it to first. That base, right there. No--don't run it to home base... Elijah stop bugging your sister! Gabriel stay away from Tyler when he's swinging... "

It's a wonder he has a voice by the end of it all. Or the nerves, for that matter.

That's a sample of life around here.
Un-cut.

::Green green grass::

It's been a long time coming, but it's finally here...
GRASS

::Foal::

For weeks our neighbours, Tammy and Anthony--new friends of ours--have been expecting the arrival of a new foal. {New lingo for me. I was calling it a "baby horse" for awhile there.} The foal was due a week ago, and Tammy was getting nervous. There is so much investment in these beautiful creatures, and she has already suffered some losses.

Last night, I went to bed around 10:30 after watching "Wives and Daughters," a movie in the Jane Austen tradition that sent Aidan into a fit of boredom, thus causing him to abandon me for his office. When I awoke after midnight he still wasn't beside me in bed. Hmm. I got up, looked across to the loft. Lights were still on there, and in the house. Finally I headed downstairs to get the phone and saw a new caller listed: Tammy & Anthony called around 11:30 pm. The van was missing in the driveway. Ah ha.

It turns out they needed an extra pair of hands.

We all headed over to see the new foal this morning. Longest legs! It was wobbling all over the place. "Cute horse," Gabriel decided. "You want to feed this one?" Anthony asked, bringing Gabriel the next stall. "Na, it's your horse," Gabriel replied. Ok.

I'll bring Caelah over this afternoon and try and get some pictures.

::Master Bedroom::

Dreams...

Reality, at the moment...

::Gulp::

In exactly two months, Annorah Kate is scheduled to be born.


This news was met with mixed emotions on my part. It's an early surgery date, which I love, as you know. But Norah will be the first of my children to be delivered by someone other than Dr. Lamensa. He will be on vacation--the nerve! I find that I have come to be rather set upon having him deliver my babies. I attribute all my easy recoveries to the skill of this man, rather than the collective circumstances that have made it so, and ultimately the grace of a good God. I've become almost superstitious, and far too sentimental. It's a common procedure. And no incompetent doctor would be allowed past the front doors of the O.R. So, once again, I must put aside my fears and rest.

July 29th @ 10:00 a.m.

Note about the name:
Annorah means Grace in Hebrew.

::Apple Blossoms::

::Sarah's apple trees::

::Hanna's Letters::

{See a few more pictures HERE }

::"Summer Berries": Letters for Leah::

Remember Leah's birthday "L" from this post?
It only took me a year to finish what I had started.

::Purple offerings::

::Picnic Table::

For Mother's Day I asked for a picnic table...
Here's why:

Aidan put it together and I painted it with several layers of black floor paint. This meant I could avoid smelly varnish, and it will still be very cleanable. As for the paint job on the walls, my dear friend Tara sacrificed her weekend to come and transform the room from a misplaced yellow to a warm earthy brown. I could never have done it without her. As it was, it was all we could do to keep little fingers off of the fresh paint...

Happy Mother's Day to me.

::Tulip Festival 2009::

It's about the kids.
And the flowers.

::Desk Chair::

"Madison Swivel" from Target

So the one thing I would have loved for Mother's Day I can't have because I can't find it!
The heavier I get, the more comfortable I want to be at my desk. It's where I unwind. Where I do a lot of my devotions. Where I communicate... I want to be cozy. Plus, it wouldn't hurt for it to be pretty too. These are examples of what I want, but can't have.

Swivel & Cushion from Pottery Barn

Ikea JOEL swivel {Discontinued!!!}

Have any of my Ottawa buddies seen anything like this around here?